were having flu since morning and was looked stone (as per PEW’s comment) for the whole day while I was in Rawang..perhaps that’s the effect of having only 12 hours sleep over the last 72 hours..crazy yeah? I felt that time may finally come that i can take MC (so stupid isnt it? where got ppl would like to get sick, sigh!!!)..so decided to go home and have a nap with the hope to get out of it..apparently this works quite well for me all this while..haha..
feeling better when I woke up one and a half hour later (8pm)..after taking shower, decided to go over to balcony to get a breath of the wind..since I stayed at the third floor, it will be breezy and cooling especially at night..I can hardly remember the last time having such a relaxed mind and also having the time to get a feel of how it likes standing at my balcony at such time..it’s just unbelievable..as weekdays already occupied by work and weekend also occupied by work in unofficial manner in Rawang (haha, i found this description quite funny)..
while standing there, I did actually ponder some of the things that my buddy told me recently which will make a big difference on my future..wondering whether it is time to make a decision and would it make a big difference if I decide to give it a try?..well, I actually given my stand and decision but I would say that it is not an 100% convincing decision..both of us know that there is still room for a change..
actually what inspired me of this post was that when I was standing there and reflecting what I have done or what has happened over the last few months, I noticed that there have been huge difference and changes onto my life..of course the “plane crashing” incident would top the list as it had completely twisted and overturned my entire future planning which I honestly did not expect it to have happened..hmm, I think it may sound a bit funny making such statement as who on earth would expect a plane crashing incident? haha..
well, I do have some great moments e.g. Cameron trip, Skytrex Adventure (Flying Fox) in Shah Alam, Mum’s birthday dinner, Malacca trip, watching MU being crowned double champion etc..apart from that, I appreciate those friends whom I have been “disturbing” over the past few months but yet not showing any sign of frustration haha..especially HA & CH, whom I think may perhaps bored of seeing me so frequently,hehe..not forgetting also ED, WK, XF, SL, SG, SW who have been laying their hands to me and helping me to get out from the wreckage of the plane..
whatever said and done, deep inside my heart, I know that there is something still unsettled there..it seems like no one know how to settle it, not even myself..how can this be? I dont know..perhaps some day or some time in the future, some one who knows the ways or found the keys to settle it, please tell me ya..
I have always known the theory that we shall never look back instead we shall be looking forward..question arises then if you never look back, how would you know what was actually behind you? there may be a tiger behind you trying to eat you but you are just so fortunate that everytime you escaped unhurt and without realising that there was a tiger actually behind you..then I can foresee the result ensuing is that you would be caught and torn apart one day without even know you had been followed all these while..
my point is that we should always look back and see what have we done or what have we gone through that is worth of bearing it in mind..only then you will start to learn more and as you go along the way, you will be prepared for whatever challenges or obstacles that hinder your way to progress..
often than not, people always say that dont ever look back again and we should only look forward..true, I am not saying that is wrong but I would say it might be applicable for those who just been released from jail la..for me, I would not mind looking back if it benefits me, why not, right? cuz sometimes the “something” at the back will bring you to your good old times and those great moment are just too precious and definitely not for sale..that’s my thought for the time being..I do realise it is a fact that ppl tend to think differently when they reach different stage of life..we shall see what will happen..only time will tell..take care guys.. Cheers!!!
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